Agreeing Child Arrangements After Separation

Separating parents not only have to come to terms with their emotions after a relationship breaks down, but also have to navigate and agree on the time they each spend with their children, which can be problematic for some and can affect the family’s arrangements for the children. This can sometimes result in the parent with primary care stopping the other parent from seeing the children, or placing unreasonable restrictions on the other parent’s time with them. Equally, the non-resident can be difficult and inflexible in the arrangements for the children. This can be distressing for both parents. It can also be upsetting and confusing for the children.

When it comes to child arrangements, the children’s needs, welfare and safety will always come first. The priority should be arrangements that serve their emotional, physical, and developmental needs, not what either parent feels entitled to.

In circumstances where it is safe, for both the child and the parent with care, it is always better for parents to try and agree arrangements between themselves. This can be supported by three main alternative processes by our experienced family law team in London:

1. Negotiation – through solicitor correspondence, we can write to your former partner putting forward proposals for the time you spend with your children and attempt to reach an agreement on these issues.

2. Discussion – we can make a referral to Mediation so parents can try and reach an agreement with the help of an experienced and trained family mediator.

3. Collaborative process – similar to mediation, except that the process is supported by lawyers, with each parent having their own lawyer. The parents and their lawyers attend joint meetings with the aim of reaching a voluntary agreement for their children.

If the parents can compromise, their agreement can be kept private and does not automatically require a formal court order. This allows for flexibility and change as your children grow, and their needs shift.

Alternatively, parents may prefer the security of a formal arrangement and to convert the voluntary agreement into a Child Arrangement Order (CAO), which is made by consent and approved by the family court.

If an agreement cannot be reached voluntarily between parents, the only option might be to apply to the Court under the Children Act 1989 for a CAO. This type of Order can regulate where the child lives and how much time each parent spends time with their child. The Order can also specifically define the level of time the child spends with each parent. This could be during the school holidays, Christmas, Easter. Not forgetting

Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, certain days of religious observance, the child’s birthday and taking them on holiday.

Whether you are trying to negotiate arrangements with your ex-partner and you are concerned about your children’s welfare or facing a court application, we can help. Our experienced family law team in London treats everyone as an individual and understands that behind every case are children who need stability, love, and to feel safe and protected.

We can help parents with:

• Negotiate practical, workable and safe arrangements.
• Prepare for and attend mediation or other non-court-based dispute resolution.
• Apply for or respond to court applications for a children’s arrangement order.
• Understand your rights and responsibilities as a parent.
• Ensure any agreements protect your children’s best interests (and where applicable the parent with care).

The information and opinions contained in this blog are for information only.  They are not intended to constitute advice and should not be relied upon or considered as a replacement for advice.  Before acting on any information contained in this blog, please seek solicitor’s advice from Gilson Gray.