The Power of Relationships in Litigation: Why Decency and Professionalism Matter

I was recently invited by a recruitment agency we partner with to speak at an event for newly qualified solicitors. I was asked to give my thoughts on a range of topics including, “What I’ve learned in my career!” I’m always happy to help or encourage lawyers starting out in the profession but I confess the topic was a little daunting. I’ve been a solicitor for over twenty years now, but I’m still learning every day!

So, what was the most important lesson I could pass on? Actually, the answer was obvious. It is the importance of relationships and how you treat people. As a litigation lawyer in Scotland, I’ve spent most of my adult life dealing with disputes – writing letters or emails, drafting pleadings, appearing in court, negotiating settlements and generally arguing with someone on behalf of my clients. But if there’s one thing that experience has reinforced, it’s this: litigation isn’t just about the law; it’s about people.

Fighting your client’s corner is non-negotiable. That’s our job. We analyse the facts, apply the law, and present the strongest possible case. But how we conduct ourselves – how we treat our clients, our colleagues, and opposing solicitors – makes a fundamental difference, both to the case at hand and to our professional lives.

Clients are People

Very few individuals or businesses relish disputes. They cost money but, often as importantly, they cause stress and anxiety. Clients may need advice on the law, but they may also need a solicitor who can communicate with them on a human level. That can mean sympathy, or it can mean delivering difficult advice. Both can be done sensitively and firmly if solicitors take the time to understand the individuals involved.

The Importance of Collegiality

Litigation may be adversarial, but it rarely needs to be antagonistic. Too often, I’ve seen solicitors take an unnecessarily combative approach, treating every interaction as a battle rather than a professional discussion. There’s a fine but crucial distinction between doing your best for your client and being difficult for the sake of it.

The reality is that the legal profession in Scotland is a small world. The solicitor you’re arguing against today might be working on the same side as you in the future. Or you might need a favour down the line. Professionalism, civility and decency go a long way. If you build a reputation as someone who is firm but sensible, you will find it much easier to get things done.

Relationships Matter More Than You Think

Good relationships with colleagues and opposing solicitors don’t just make daily life easier – they make you a better lawyer. A well-placed phone call to an opponent, rather than a flurry of aggressive emails, can resolve issues before they escalate. A solicitor who trusts you is more likely to engage in meaningful settlement discussions. And when you do end up in court, it is usually in clients’ interests for lawyers to focus on the disputes that matter.

Decency and Strength Are Not Mutually Exclusive

I sometimes get the impression that some solicitors see being courteous is a sign of weakness, especially in emails. That’s nonsense. The best litigators I’ve known – whether at the Sheriff Court or the Court of Session – are those who command respect through their knowledge, preparation, and measured approach. They don’t resort to bluster or personal attacks because they don’t need to.

Behaving decently doesn’t mean rolling over. It means picking battles wisely, standing firm where necessary and recognising that the ultimate goal is achieving the best outcome for our clients. It also means remembering that we are all trying to do our jobs to the best of our ability and that problems are rarely solved by being rude.

So, if I were to distil my years in practice into a single lesson, it would be this: be a formidable litigator but never forget the value of decency. The relationships you build today will define your career tomorrow. And in the long run, a reputation for fairness, integrity and skill is the most powerful asset any litigator can have.

Rosie Walker is a partner and Head of Litigation and Dispute Resolution at Gilson Gray LLP.

To discuss any of the points raised further, please contact a member of our Litigation team here.

The information and opinions contained in this blog are for information only.  They are not intended to constitute advice and should not be relied upon or considered as a replacement for advice.  Before acting on any information contained in this blog, please seek solicitor’s advice from Gilson Gray.